‘Performance’ rap music video pokes fun at roadies, fixed gear riders

roadies make a rap dis song about fixies, now that’s irony.

kettle calling the pot black?

can’t wait for the fixie response song.

While I find both camps equally annoying, I do support rap beefs/battles. The fixie crew better respond. I have a camera and can edit, someone contact me, this could be fun.

I’m not sure roadies get off so easy in this video.

Anyway, whatever, if fixies are a fashion statement, it’s more innocuous than mink stoles or glass pack mufflers.

I laughed out loud and sent the link to all my buddies! Brilliant!

Great. Now I have to get a road bike to be cool. What’s next? Mountain Bikes?

What’s next?

It’s all SoftRides now.

Did roadies just jump the shark? Time for TT bikes…

–Bill

Well of *course* Roadie Van Dorkus can skewer Fixie McHipsterson. What’s the latter going to do to the former – axle him upside the head?

‘its all about commutin….got elastic on my leg and an ipod in my ear.’

‘yeah all about commutin….rock my blinky lights and my bright yellow pannier.’

man you can hate on all kinds of bikey types this way!

Good concept but man that guy has no flow whatsoever. I think the fixie community could absolutely SCORCH this guy senseless if they found someone who could rhyme with some conviction.

But otherwise, I did laugh a bit at this video. I’m neither a “performance” rider nor a fixie rider, but I love the battling inner factions in the cycling community. Long live bikesnob!

That was hilarious!

This is like a BikeSnob NYC column set to music and exactly what our community needs and is sorely lacking: a self-deprecating sense of humor.

Jonathan, do you get satire? I am a roadie and this was much more about making fun of roadies? Well done, do you think Colbert is a conservative?

Anyone who can’t admit that both roadies and fixie riders offer a lot to laugh about needs to chill out.

I know what I’ll be singing on the way home today… that’s right, “Performance, that’s the name of the game. I pump up my tires and I oil my change… And I always ride through the pain.”

Should be “oil my chain”. 🙂

That was very funny.

Zoobomb skewers itself, I guess you didn’t see the play/musical “Nerds on Bikes”.

I thought it was hilarious, but I’m neither a fixie or road rider. I’m hoping the recumbent crew jumps in on this battle. Those dudes have some serious flow.

@Russell

Here here.

someone please make a video of the commuter set

“…got my gortex rain coat, rain gloves, and my rain hat …you cant understand- $500 for my rain pants…”

“…its all about performance, can’t feel the rain…”

Because commuters are so without sin. We can start with the self-righteous attitude, the ability to look down at others, even if they are on a tallbike. It’s funny when I ride a freakbike I hardly ever get an “on your left” out of a commuter, they are usually too busy giving me the stinkeye.

My favorite is when I’m on my track bike and I can hear you upshifting behind me so you can blow past me down a hill where my low gearing limits my top speed. Then you downshift thru about 4 gears, not one a t time, you just dump it down 4 and your poor bike is going “clunk, clunk, clunk!” and then you start spinning up the hill at a walking pace as blow past you climbing, standing up.

As a fair dinkum passport carrying Australian I feel fully qualified to ask – WHATS WITH THE JERSEY ??????

Yeah – go on – you know you want to watch it again ……… !

Wow! This is gettin’ blown up! In a good way if you count you tube views. Not in a good way if you think this was actually to dis any group of riders.
I’ve watched it ten times my self, mostly with friends that I thought’d get a chuckle. Its been fBooked to me a few times and I’ve gotten emails from good friends plugg’n it. It got big fast — I think uploaded monday night… over 23,000 hits already, in two days!
I do believe ‘Performance’ is an inside-the-scene critique of exactly the lines — that some people’s responses seem to want to defend — that some have been created (or found) within our subculture. There is no doubt in my mind that both the fixie kids and those with the money (or dedication) to throw down on 10spd engage in their love of cycling in equal magnitudes.
I don’t know what I’d do without my (fixed) commuter or my (10spd) road bike… with a carbon frame.
Lets laugh at ourselves with a big smile and keep ridin’ to get ourselves happy and ‘there’ on time. It is/shouldbe after all one big family.
Thank you Robin and Jake. Priceless!

That video is hilarious! For both “camps”. I’m 50 years old, and blew past more than one “performance” bike/biker on the hills at the Portland Providence Bride Pedal this past weekend…on my 16lb carbon fork, Gates carbon belt drive “fixie”….yee haw! signed, Grandma on a bike.

ps…I like the performance bikes too (except that spandex crap)…can’t you kids all get along?

Grandma, over and out!

Gotta say, I agree with BSNYC that while I found it amusing, I kept assuming that it was an ad (overt or subliminal) for Performance Bikes.

Am I missing something? I didn’t really think it was all that clever or funny. (but I understand how hardcore cyclists might latch onto it). The spoof/white-rap video thing is tired and worn out.

Jonathan, thanks for posting the vid here. I saw it first via email and thought it was the bomb. Don’t know why, maybe just cause I love biking so much, maybe being PDX. I love to laugh at my own snobbery. But seriously, I get a thrill out of every kind of biker, that I pass~