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Local bike team will hold “wax off tournament”

Buffered Bike Lane with a bike symbol and arrow pointing forward


Event flyer

Leave it to Portland’s very own Team Beer to do what might possibly be the most outlandish bike team sponsorship promotion ever: The Team Beer/WaxOn Wax Off.

According to Team Beer spokesman John Howe, the event is a way to get some attention for their newest sponsor, WaxOn Spa on East Burnside. Howe says several teams have committed to take part and so far there are eight contestants. “The theory of the contest is to see who makes the biggest transformation — from toes to neck.”

Here’s more from the event’s Facebook page:

“What separates the Euro Trash Racer and Fred is the preparation necessary for achieving the highest level of athletic performance. When you approach the start line with sleek tan calves, you are saying to your competitors ” I am prepared to make you suffer as I am an aerodynamic marvel and you are a hairy wannabe that will be dragged to the back of the pack by your neglect of your machine.”

I asked Mr. Howe if he’s a regular waxer. “Yes, I’ve done it. It does hurt, but the bonus is you’ve only got to do it once every five weeks or so.” As for this contest — in which some competitors will wax their you-know-whats — all I can say is, anything for a sponsor.

Come out and cheer for your favorite team. Wax on!

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