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View Full Version : The Story of the Man as Weird as a 2 Dollar Bill


marco452
05-18-2007, 05:38 PM
The following is a true story. Really.

So I'm riding across the Hawthorne Bridge on 5/14 around 5 pm back to downtown where I live after a trip to the dentist on... you guessed it, Hawthorne. On the right side where I belong, I see a guy cycling toward me making quite a bit of noise, as if he's talking loudly to himself or had just harangued some poor pedestrian for nothing.

While keeping a sharp eye on him to avoid collision, I notice pieces of paper flying out of his pockets, and by the time he is passing me, I realize that it's money! So, not wanting to appear too greedy (because that would be wrong), I turn around and yell, "Hey dude! Your money!" But he's too far away in space or brain and makes no response. So I daintily park my bike against the railing and start to look for some money, on the one hand not wanting to seem greedy but on the other hand realizing that it had probably all fallen through the metal grating by now. But no! There's a bill! And I see a 2 on it, so I unfold it, hoping...

But it's 'just' a $2 bill - no more zeros to enrich me. And a walker who had also seen him found another one. Which he insisted on giving to me (do I look poor because the ride I was on isn't 100% carbon fiber?). So maybe I should... donate $4 to BikePortland.org? No wait, let's make it an even... 5? ;)

Somehow I thought of the old expression, "he's as weird as a two-dollar bill." (Which I fear had a common, homophobic form, alas).

ps I gave BikePortland 10 (and you should do the same), gave the $2 bill to a friend who had loaned me TriMet fair one day, and left the story on a friendís answering machine. She erased it because she thought I had made it up.

TiAx
05-20-2007, 02:38 PM
I think the expression was a "three dollar bill", but hey, great story.

bikieboy
05-21-2007, 04:13 PM
Marco, good story!

SyntaxPolice
05-28-2007, 08:47 PM
I saw someone on the Max giving away $2 bills as some sort of promotion a few weeks ago. Wonder if it's related...