Reader Story: Passerby helps calm aggressive honker

Reader MeiLin Miranda recently had a traffic interaction I thought was worth sharing. It’s a story about a display of road rage being defused by a passerby on foot that came to the verbal aid of MeiLin and her daughter while they were biking in Southeast Portland…

“My 14-year-old daughter and I had made a last holiday shopping expedition to the Hawthorne District and were cruising west down Madison on our bikes. I think it was at 37th when this happened — it’s a really narrow street that should have parking removed from one if not both sides of the road, but alas.

“They’re legal, they’re at a stop sign, and there are cars coming! What is with you? What do you want them to do? Seriously, what do you expect them to do?”

We were stopped at the intersection (Madison has the stop but 37th doesn’t). A bunch of cars on 37th decided it would be awesome to all try to get through the bottleneck at once from both sides. What a mess. People backing up, driving onto the sidewalk, cars coming and going in weird ways. The intersection was dangerous, and not just for bikes. Thank goodness they were all moving slowly. Even if it had been a four-way stop there was no safe path through the intersection even if it looked clear; there was too much wackiness on both sides.

The car behind us started honking at us really aggressively. Suddenly a young man on the sidewalk announced in an extremely audible voice, “They’re legal, they’re at a stop sign, and there are cars coming! What is with you? What do you want them to do? Seriously, what do you expect them to do?” He said more that I don’t remember — nothing abusive, just standing up to the driver. He didn’t confront the driver and kept walking, and the driver stopped honking. I was flustered enough that I didn’t say “thank you.” (The kid says she did but doesn’t think he heard her.)

“I think this guy coming to our defense shut the aggressive driver down, and I’m grateful; he un-harshed my holiday mellow.”

I am a really safe, visible, non-confrontational, law-abiding bicyclist; I don’t block traffic, I obey traffic laws, I take my lane but if I can defer safely, I do. Even so, I have had similar things happen where aggressive honking has turned into dangerous speeding past, verbal abuse and so on, as have we all. One guy almost pushed me off the road on 12th past Powell just that way. Aggressive honking is nerve-wracking; you always have to wonder if the driver is going to escalate.

I think this guy coming to our defense shut the aggressive driver down, and I’m grateful; he un-harshed my holiday mellow. I wish I could have thanked him better.”

While the aggressive honking and behavior of the person driving the car was unfortunate, the actions of the stranger remind us that we’re not alone out there.

Do you have a story you’d like to share? Get in touch.

Jonathan Maus (Publisher/Editor)

Jonathan Maus (Publisher/Editor)

Founder of BikePortland (in 2005). Father of three. North Portlander. Basketball lover. Car owner and driver. If you have questions or feedback about this site or my work, feel free to contact me at @jonathan_maus on Twitter, via email at maus.jonathan@gmail.com, or phone/text at 503-706-8804. Also, if you read and appreciate this site, please become a supporter.

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9watts
9watts
12 years ago

Don’t tell Amanda Fritz.

Arem
Arem
12 years ago
Reply to  9watts

Why?

are
12 years ago
Reply to  Arem

because madison is one of those side streets she thinks bicyclists should relegate themselves to in order to avoid exactly this kind of confrontation

9watts
9watts
12 years ago
Reply to  Arem

It might upset her notion that bicyclists’ riding habits are usefully singled out as endangering others, and no funding for ‘their’ infrastructure will be forthcoming until they all shape up and obey all traffic laws.

sorebore
sorebore
12 years ago
Reply to  9watts

I am outta’ the loop a bit on Amanda Fritz, Is this a consensus most folks share? Help me with a quote if you can. thanks.

9watts
9watts
12 years ago
Reply to  sorebore

sorebore,
here’s a start (from bikeportland Dec 7, 2011):

“In August, she told us she would vote for the City’s federal funding request for a bike-sharing system only when, “I see bike riders using downtown streets and sidewalks in a safe manner.” She said she regularly sees “cyclists… endangering and harassing pedestrians” on the sidewalk and that, “The cycling community seems to be doing little or nothing to educate riders or reduce these dangerous behaviors.”

Spiffy
12 years ago

more people should speak up in others’ defense…

chelsea
chelsea
12 years ago
Reply to  Spiffy

Agreed. Not bike related, but one time I was walking down the street and some dude made some untoward comments about my body, not an uncommon experience. A random woman chastised him and it was so awesome. Only time that has ever happened. Amazing how frequently people just ignore indecent behavior.

Rol
Rol
12 years ago
Reply to  chelsea

“Thanks so much for your input, random street degenerate!”

Rol
Rol
12 years ago
Reply to  chelsea

(That’s what you say to him, in my fantasy.)

sorebore
sorebore
12 years ago
Reply to  Spiffy

agreed

Mark
Mark
12 years ago

I think all cars should have a circuit that deploys the airbag if the horn is held down for more than three seconds. I know that sounding the horn is an important way to alert someone to a dangerous situation, but these jackholes that lay on the horn for several seconds are only screaming out a big FU to everyone.

Randall S.
Randall S.
12 years ago
Reply to  Mark

My cousin once suggested that horns should be on a speedpass-like toll, where the first three are free, and each one after costs like $10.

In related news, NYC has a $350 fine for non-emergency honking. Just throwing that out there…

Lastly: cars don’t “decide” anything. Drivers do.

cw
cw
12 years ago
Reply to  Randall S.

in the 10 years i lived in NYC, i never once saw anyone get ticketed for honking. used to live above the exit for the lincoln tunnel, and the honking was GOD awful.

sorebore
sorebore
12 years ago
Reply to  Mark

Numerous city’s around the world have laws concerning the abuse of auto horn noise. Perhaps….????

Always Correct
Always Correct
12 years ago

It sounds like you were blocking traffic because you didn’t understand how right-of-way works and were too scared to proceed through the stop sign when it was your turn to go.

I’d honk at you too in that situation, and I’m a cyclist!

El Biciclero
El Biciclero
12 years ago
Reply to  Always Correct

Two-way stop, Bub. I assume you understand how right-of-way works at two-way stops. You would have been just as rude to honk as the person in this story.

ron
ron
12 years ago
Reply to  Always Correct

Always correct…except for now. Cars coming in the opposite direction. Sitting at a stop sign.

Nick V
Nick V
12 years ago

The holiday/shopping/driving/parking stress seems to bring out the worst in people, behind the wheel for example, but that’s no excuse for obnoxiously honking one’s horn.

That said, when I lived in the Hawthorne area, I normally biked down either Salmon or Lincoln. Less stress and many more cyclists on those streets.

Rol
Rol
12 years ago

Come up with some new ways to participate in Christmas, people. Extensive shopping, in wintertime, at the same time many other people are doing it, is not a recipe for happiness. That goes for the hapless bikers, the hurried slow-motion criss-crossers, and the impatient aggro honker.

Mark Allyn
12 years ago
Reply to  Rol

I have been making my family home made gifts for the last 15 years. That has been extremely relaxing and fulfilling.

I make it a habit to start making my gifts in September so that they will be finished the first week of November. I then send them to the family a week or so *before* Thanksgiving.

That leaves the holidays totally free for me to glow in the dark and let myself shine in my beauty for Peacock Lane, the Holiday Bicycle Drive, and the rest of Portland!

wsbob
12 years ago

I wonder if the person laying on the horn was specifically frustrated with the people ahead on the bike, or just out of general frustration with the chaos of Christmas traffic.

Something that ought to maybe be included in the drivers manual, is a point to prospective drivers, explaining to them how loud car horns are to people when they’re not in a car and located near a car whose horn has been activated.

The intensity of motor vehicle horns to unshielded ears is something it would seem everyone that drives should be aware of, but maybe aren’t

Al
Al
12 years ago

This has happened to me before, several times. I’m waiting at a stop sign for traffic to clear before proceeding (they did not have a stop sign) and driver honks at ME for not putting myself in front of traffic! All I did was turn around, look at him and then pointed to stop sign. He stopped honking. I’ve done this before at other intersections with success, and it also works at path crossings that are marked with signage indicating bike/ped crossing giving me the ROW over the drivers on the street; plant myself near the crossing sign and point to it as drivers go by…it usually works pretty quick. My greatest fear is at one stop sign at the bottom of a hill, in which the sidewalk is bumped out and the street narrows. The street is too narrow for both a bike/car at the same time so I have to take the lane. If there’s other traffic with ROW (3 way stop at T intersection) or peds, I come to a full stop to yield. I try to signal my stop for drivers behind me, but it’s not always possible to remove one hand while braking – I also make it clear I am stopping here by often putting a foot down. Drivers constantly roll the stop and expect me do to so too or crowd me because I’ve stopped and they are inconvenienced for 3 seconds. This is where I fear a rear-ending the most, drivers not expecting a full stop from a cyclist, but then getting pissed if I do a full stop. It’s less about the ROW than driver impatience.

Joe
Joe
12 years ago

The horn is used as a aggression mode for the driver these days. It can really spook a cyclist if abused.

q`Tzal
q`Tzal
12 years ago

wsbob
I wonder if the person laying on the horn was specifically frustrated with the people ahead on the bike, or just out of general frustration with the chaos of Christmas traffic.

From Oregon drivers manual:
“Using the Horn
“… Use it when it will help prevent a collision, not to
display temper or irritation.”

wsbob
The intensity of motor vehicle horns to unshielded ears is something it would seem everyone that drives should be aware of, but maybe aren’t

Like when cops get trained with tasers they have to to get tazed themselves?

wsbob
12 years ago
Reply to  q`Tzal

There’s really no excuse for expressing frustration by laying on the horn. It’s a simple fact though that people on occasion use the horn this way.

Some people have strong feelings to the contrary, but I think it’s possible to be fairly low key in the use of their car’s horn for practical purposes:

“…It is possible to “whisper” rather than “shout” with a horn. Don’t lean on it. Just tap it. …” John Lascurettes

I considered whether prospective driver’s as part of their driver’s test, should maybe be subjected to the blare of a car’s horn while standing right next to it. Interesting to think what the reaction to such a proposal might be. Not enthusiastic, I would think.

Paul in the 'couve
Paul in the 'couve
12 years ago

I was riding the dangerous no bikelane stretch of Columbia Drive the other day. Traffic was light in mid afternoon and good visibility and I was riding with a SuperFlash blinking. Knowing the dangers of that stretch and given the traffic conditions I was taking the lane and watching for cars in my mirror. As cars approached from behind they slowed down and started to move left, then I would move as far to the right as was reasonable and let them pass.

Then this SUV turns onto Columbia, not even up to the speed limit yet and while at least 5 car lengths behind me starts honking repeatedly. Being dangerously stubborn I held the lane until she was right behind me honking like a maniac and continued to honk even after I moved right to let her by. Idiots.

Paul in the 'couve
Paul in the 'couve
12 years ago

I forgot to admit that I also failed to resist the urge to make an inflammatory gesture.

John Lascurettes
12 years ago

I had the opposite experience with a passerby. I was biking in the bike lane on NW Broadway between the bridge and Burnside doing 20-something MPH and was even with a hood of an SUV next to me. Suddenly the guy speeds up, barely passing me, throws on his blinker and turns right at the corner in one maneuver. I had to slam on my breaks to avoid hitting his quarter panel and going down.

I chased him down and let him know that what he did was very dangerous and illegal. Yes, I was shouting, it was passionate and I was still shaking – but there wasn’t a single name call or mean thing said between either of us. So I was saying to him, “Please! Watch what you do. Check around you! You nearly killed me!”

A woman walking past on the sidewalk shouted, “what do you want, at least he said he was sorry!” as if I had no justification for being as concerned as I was. She’s right, he did apologize, but her tone was one of being incredulous that I had anything to complain about at all.

As I posted to my fb feed that day:

To the guy that almost right hooked me to my death at 25 MPH in the bike lane, thanks for apologizing when I got in your face. No name calling by either one of us.

To the lady that yelled from the sidewalk, “Hey, at least he apologized” – ƒµ¢k you and butt out. Does that suddenly diminish the illegality or danger of what he did? (answer: no)

Scott
Scott
12 years ago

You missed getting hit by an SUV? Was it decrepit? Damn. You might have missed an impromtu vacation followed up by getting paid by the dudes insurance. His fault, your money plehbwoi. Bones heal. Bank accounts don’t.

Machu Picchu
Machu Picchu
12 years ago
Reply to  Scott

Bank accounts heal better than corpses revive.

esther c
esther c
12 years ago

AS in sorry I almost killed you. I love the idea that your being angry is as bad as his almost killing you.

What was his excuse, didn’t understand the law about right of way or was just in too big a hurry and figured you would stop to keep from getting killed?

John Lascurettes
12 years ago
Reply to  esther c

Actually the guy was rather graciously sorry and receptive to hearing me out. He never once argued that he didn’t do anything wrong. I educated him on the side path law, both how I’m relegated to it and how he must yield to all traffic in it. I also just requested that he always, always check his surroundings more.

I talked to the woman later too. Yup, rolled over to her and asked her if she understood the gravity of the situation and she just re-squawked, “he said he was sorry, what more do you want?” and kept on walking.

are
12 years ago

it is not at all uncommon for the second car in line at an intersection to lean on the horn when the driver of the first car is waiting for pedestrians to clear the crosswalk before executing a turn. i will often chastise the offender, but i admit this is largely because the horn startles me, not because i have an instinct to be helpful. when you are trapped inside a metal box, the horn is the only “voice” you have, and because it is a shout rather than a whisper you have to learn to be without a voice except when shouting is needed.

John Lascurettes
12 years ago
Reply to  are

It is possible to “whisper” rather than “shout” with a horn. Don’t lean on it. Just tap it. When I can see that the person in front of me is looking down at something in their lap (such as a phone, oy vey) at a fresh green light, the reaction is much more appreciative when it’s done to just get their attention than to shout and whine with the horn.

esther c
esther c
12 years ago

Yes, when the light changes and the person in front of you isn’t paying attention it is possible to politely tap the horn to remind them to look. Not at all like laying on the horn rudely.

dmc
dmc
12 years ago
Reply to  are

well said. I rarely interpret the horn as anything other than “WTF!!!!!!!!!”

resopmok
resopmok
12 years ago
Reply to  are

It’s possible to open your window and speak from inside the metal box. People can still hear you too, it’s pretty amazing.

Machu Picchu
Machu Picchu
12 years ago
Reply to  are

“when you are trapped inside a metal box. ..”

Unless I missed the part about about the doors being stuck, I’d say “hiding in a metal box” is the reason most people that blare obnoxious noise at others immediately in front of them feel safe doing so. When people are less shielded (say, waiting for an escalator in a crowded store) they tend to be more discreet and civil.

MeiLin Miranda
12 years ago

I normally don’t take Madison either; we were coming from Fred’s, though, and it’s the safest way I’ve found to get to and from 34th to Fred’s. We don’t even ride 34th much, either–it’s busy! We usually cut down to 32nd as soon as we’re able. Even were we to ride one block north, we’d still have to go down Madison to cut over–no way I’m riding down 38th by Fred’s! 😉

I’ll have to reconsider our usual route, at least at the holiday season.

Stripes
Stripes
12 years ago
Reply to  MeiLin Miranda

I think you raise valid point. Why is SE 34th SO BUSY? It is supposed to function as a bike boulevard. Yet in actuality, it functions as little more than two lanes of extra auto capacity for SE 30th. It’s completely unacceptable.

drew
drew
12 years ago
Reply to  Stripes

because there’s a traffic light on hawthorne and belmont, and only one stop sign.

dmc
dmc
12 years ago

In the context of the story as the pedestrian, I would speak out 10 out of 10 times. If I didn’t, I would feel like a coward and I would probably be upset with myself for a little while.

Al from PA
Al from PA
12 years ago

Still, one should be careful trying to “calm” a frenzied driver. One could easily find oneself (at best) staring down the barrel of a gun. See the recent incident (and near-tragedy) recounted recently in the NY TImes:

http://www.nytimes.com/2011/12/27/us/more-concealed-guns-and-some-are-in-the-wrong-hands.html?scp=1&sq=concealed%20weapons%20carrying&st=cse

velvetackbar
velvetackbar
12 years ago
Reply to  Al from PA

nah…you might find someone who rolls up their window, or maybe shouts back. Being shot at is going to be a rare occurrence: man bites dog sort of thing.

9watts
9watts
12 years ago
Reply to  velvetackbar

“Being shot at is going to be a rare occurrence: man bites dog sort of thing.”
It happened to me in high school. Maybe not as uncommon as you’d think.

Scott
Scott
12 years ago
Reply to  9watts

I’ve been shot at on my bike 5 times in 4 cities. DOUBLE DOWN CHICAGO!!!!

Greg
Greg
12 years ago
Reply to  9watts

Perhaps it’s just you.

esther c
esther c
12 years ago
Reply to  velvetackbar

Yep, can’t live your whole life as if the worst possible consequence of any action might happen. If that was the case, none of us would be on bikes. You’re probably more likely to get creamed by a bad driver anyday that shot.

spare_wheel
spare_wheel
12 years ago
Reply to  Al from PA

i read that article as:

be very afraid of militant scofflaw cyclists who could be packing heat, motorists.

Randall S.
Randall S.
12 years ago
Reply to  Al from PA

One should be careful committing felonies like menacing and assault with a deadly weapon, lest you end up in prison because you couldn’t control yourself.

News outlets publish uncommon occurrences, not ordinary ones. The risk of a driver pulling a gun on you on a large scale is pretty unlikely.

9watts
9watts
12 years ago
Reply to  Randall S.

“The risk of a driver pulling a gun on you on a large scale is pretty unlikely.”
My scale isn’t very large. Once was more than enough for me.

velvetackbar
velvetackbar
12 years ago
Reply to  9watts

Fair enough.

I will see your anecdote and raise you a lifetime of experiences:

I am around guns and their owners a LOT, and as a liberal amongst conservatives, I am often on the wrong side in a political discussion. These discussions often get extremely heated (I don’t back down when i have facts on my side.) I have never, *not even once*, had a gun pointed at me.

Of course, this wasn’t on a bicycle. Maybe that was the missing ingredient?

I am only going to say that your experience was not common, 9watts.

9watts
9watts
12 years ago
Reply to  velvetackbar

“I am only going to say that your experience was not common, 9watts.”
Fair enough. I very much hope so. Scott’s experience notwithstanding.
FWIW I was walking when I was shot at.

velvetackbar
velvetackbar
12 years ago
Reply to  9watts

Thats what you get for being on foot 😉

Next time try a tall-bike! Everyone loves a tallbike 🙂

Dan O
Dan O
12 years ago

Not alone, but certainly a minority – too often disrespected – a largely disdained *fringe* minority where I ride.

Spike Bike!

Evan
Evan
12 years ago

You know, there are a lot of slow-moving vehicles on the road that are not bikes. Buses and large trucks of course, but there are also mail trucks, garbage trucks, etc. We all get stuck behind them. Do people honk at a Tri-Met bus for stopping to pick up or drop off passengers? No, they simply deal with it. So why should being behind such a vehicle at a busy intersection be any different? At least they weren’t behind my wife’s grandmother in her car, they could have been there all day.

thefuture
thefuture
12 years ago

Next time a driver gives me grief I plan to ask them why they’re trying to harsh my mellow.

thefuture
thefuture
12 years ago
Reply to  thefuture

Better yet….why they’re trying to harsh up my cool on.

Jolly Dodger
12 years ago

Carrying a weapon will only escalate any situation. The urge to pull it to “prove a point”…or get that apology that never seems to come – may seem a good idea…at the time. But accidental misfires, return fire, innocent bystanders…and most importantly…REGRET – will haunt the rest of your life. I always feel a little guilty and ashamed even when i feel i’m in the right, when i get hostile & vocal. I always seem to let the “fight or flight” instinct turn me into Mr.Hyde. Then later, with hindsight i feel i over reacted. The adrenaline alone from a near miss could lead to someone getting hurt too easily when a firearm is involved, when what we’re all really after is to get where we are going safely and with mutual respect.

velvetackbar
velvetackbar
12 years ago
Reply to  Jolly Dodger

You know, this really isn’t about “weapons.”

Its about standing up for what is right, and using the easiest tool at hand (literally, the voice) to make clear what is right and what is wrong.

If someone chooses to carry a different tool (hammer or ulock or blunderbuss) I am sure we can all agree that things *could* get out of hand, but one would hope that cooler heads would simply stick to the easiest tool at hand: vocal chords.

Joe
Joe
12 years ago

One time guy pulled up next to and I asked him to please drive safe my kids need their dad, his response was shut the eff up or your kids will never see you again.

Julia
12 years ago

It’s easy to get rattled by agressive honking. So great to hear that a passerby spoke up!

Stripes
Stripes
12 years ago

I have noticed this A LOT on SE Madison too. Between SE 6th & SE 30th, a cr*p-ton of motorists now use it to avoid the traffic that gets backed up on Hawthorne, or, heaven forbid, having to wait 12 seconds at a red light.

I had one particularly nasty incident with some sort of pizza delivery SUV about a month ago, that decided that despite it being a quiet, low-traffic neighborhood side street, they ought to have the GD right to floor it up the street at 35 miles per hour. They honked aggressively & then sped past me far too close.

I don’t know what pizza company it was as the driver was going way too fast, but the SUV was white, and I distinctly remember one of the words it had emblazoned at a jaunty angle on the back of the vehicle was “garlic”. Hotlips? Pizzacato?

If anybody knows, I would LOVE to find out. I really, really want to write a letter of complaint to that pizza company.

esther c
esther c
12 years ago

I tell people to read their drivers manual and have a nice day.

Stripes
Stripes
12 years ago

PS. There’s been a lot of talk about “weapons” here in the comments section. While the urge to smash a few windshields with a u-lock is ever present, I would of course never actually do that.

So what’s a girl to do?

THIS.

Don’t forget the most important weapon of all when biking… YOUR CELL PHONE CAMERA.

You would not believe the unbelievable level of sudden “cooperation” I encounter from aggressive, vile motorists the moment I pull my cell phone out of my pocket and point it directly at their front license plate, so that they can see me doing it.

I have never seen so many horns stop honking, & fast apologies issued in my life. If it wasn’t so depressing, it would be hilarious.

Seth Alford
Seth Alford
12 years ago

Stripes wrote, “Don’t forget the most important weapon of all when biking… YOUR CELL PHONE CAMERA.”

Or your helmet cam. I have it running all the time I’m riding. It’s not as obvious as a cell phone camera. But on the other hand, a running helmet camera doesn’t require you to take your hand off the handlebar and go into your pocket.

Stripes also wrote, “I had one particularly nasty incident with some sort of pizza delivery SUV about a month ago….” A helmet cam might have captured the name of the pizza company and maybe even the license plate.

Machu Picchu
Machu Picchu
12 years ago
Reply to  Seth Alford

I’m ignorant, here, Seth. Where does all this data go, especially if you run it all the time? Rephrase: How do you manage that data? Thanks.

A.K.
A.K.
12 years ago
Reply to  Machu Picchu

I’d simply over-write the same recorded data day after day UNLESS something out of the ordinary happened, then I’d archive it. That would cut down on the amount of data that has to be saved, just like how store security footage is being over-written constantly unless it needs to be saved for a specific reason.

Seth Alford
Seth Alford
12 years ago
Reply to  Machu Picchu

Transfer the data to an external disk drive. Put each day’s clips into a directory named after the date of the clips.

When the drive fills, decide what to delete.

Any day where there is only 1 clip is probably a day that can be deleted. Because 1 clip means I never flipped the switch on the camera to stop the current recording and start another, because something interesting just happened. Similarly, if it is a commute day, and if there are only 2 recordings, one for the trip to work, one for the trip back, that’s also a candidate for deletion.

I’m running Linux, so I have tools available that’ll tell me how many files are in a directory, etc. That helps make automating the deletion process a little easier.

Archiving clips to offline media like DVDs or tapes is possible, if you have the money or patience. Tapes drives are expensive, and the tapes are not cheap either. DVDs are big enough to hold most clips. But they take time to burn. Then you have to organize a stack of DVDs.

Another option is to buy another disk drive when the first one fills. I just did that. That also has a problem: what to do when the second drive fills.

John Mulvey
John Mulvey
12 years ago

People are in a shopping frenzy in that area, and it’s not just at Christmastime. Stop signs are optional.

zed
zed
12 years ago

more air raid horns to fight back with! 🙂

kenny
12 years ago

I have this Pavlov’s like response to this type of behavior. It is almost instinctual for me to focus on the license plate of said car. Yelling or honking triggers “Get that plate # and call 911”

Whether it be someone yelling, teen kid screaming something quickly out the passenger window (most common so far), someone nearly left hooking me, or someone getting dangerously close…. I engrave that plate # in my head…. pull over, and call 911.

I don’t know if jerks that do these things realize how potentially life threatening this is to a cyclist?

spare_wheel
spare_wheel
12 years ago

the chances of getting shot at are almost certainly less than the chances of dying in an accident…and yet many cyclists greet road rage with passivity and fear.